Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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