Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
