It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize
