After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
