i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
