I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
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