just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
tell your sister to shave her snatch
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize