He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
