no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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