i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Did I show you my penis last night?
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
