Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
