he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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