so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
