MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize