Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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