I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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