only you would photoshop your dick
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
