so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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