saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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