She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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