Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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