Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
