he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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