Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
