i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
