Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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