you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
