I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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