This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
