i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
