I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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