She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Randomize
