Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
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