You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Sober January is a disaster.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
