god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
