Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
