Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
