he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
