I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
