what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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