apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize