You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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