This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize