Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Randomize
