my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
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