Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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