we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize
