still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Pants are for mortals
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