Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
