my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
